27/4/2010
Actually this few days i m quite happy
at least i can smile and joke to people around me
i guess i m be alrite soon
BUT
I dunno y I m feeling down at this movement
after i back from posting today I feel very tired and I wish i can sleep like pig straight away
BUT TOO BAD CANT
I dowan make myself sick sleep all the germs from hospital, I must bath first before I climb up to my bed and sleep with my lovely bei bei
After i finish bathing my roomate come back le
I m happy at least got somebody to accompany me and i wont feel so lonely
BUT AGAIN
she tell me she is going out after she bath.....aiks...
suan le ba..I better go and prepare dinner for me and jing xuan to divert my attention
I prepare all the ingredients happily..i found my passion in cooking..^^
he cross my mind again..I remember I promised him to learn a dish which he love on our valentine celebration
if I start to learn now...will him still want to taste it???
Because of my tiredness,I left the soup boiling and i went to have a nap
After one hour I wake up and smell unpleasant smell
OMG my carrot soup hangus d...I was like ......so disappointed..I tot I can have a wonderful dinner with jing xuan to9 because I cook the soup with lots of passion...TT
At the same time, jing xuan sms me and say she dowan to have dinner with me already
I guess she dunno tat I already start preparing and my soup hangus ad
I was so down but i still reply her never mind la......actually i m SO SAD!!
I throw away the hangus soup and keep all the ingredients back in the freeze
I dunno why the life without u is like so tough for me
I cant do everything smoothly
Without yr hug as encouragement I dunno how to move on
I close myself in my room and start to EMO...
I noe u hate seeing me emo but forgive me please I feel so down suddenly><
I went to read yr fb post and blog again again and again......
I MISS YOU
I know you are better off without me
I know you are enjoying yr single life everyday
I also know sometimes you will think off me still
But you are truly letting it go
I really dunno shud I happy or sad everytime I read something about me in yr blog
Happpy because you think of me still??
Sad because it make me feel I cant letting it go???
I m confused...
You were ignoring me when I trying hard to hold our relationship
And the way you ignore me was like damm CRUEL??
Those words u said to me I still can remember although i already delete all those messages
You totally change into a stranger now
I dunno anything about u now
What I can do is just read yr blog everyday to noe more about u...
There is no turning back for U
And there is no road for me to move on now
I m still living in the past which make me hate myself so much
Is hard for me to forgot all the things I have done with u and yet u came to my dream almost everyday
It makes me feel so sad everyday in the morning
How good if our brain have a DELETE button ><
we can delete everything which harm ourself ^^
then our life would be happier
however there is a word BUT in tis world
everything go on smoothly but in the end aso will change....CORRECT?
the God wont be so kind to us..
God want us to learn in failure and lead us to a brighter future...<3
